If sex ends before you or your partner want it to, it can feel embarrassing and frustrating. Premature ejaculation (PE) usually means ejaculating sooner than you'd like, often within about a minute of penetration, but what's key is the distress and how it affects your relationship. The good news: there are simple steps you can try right now and effective treatments your doctor can offer.
PE doesn’t have one cause. For some guys it’s mostly physical — high penile sensitivity, low serotonin levels, certain medical issues, or inflammation. For others it’s anxiety, stress, relationship tension, or bad sexual habits. Often it’s a mix. Figuring out what’s driving it for you helps pick the right fix.
Start-stop and squeeze are two cheap, proven techniques you can use alone or with a partner. With start-stop, stimulate until you’re close, stop, breathe, then start again. Squeeze means press the base of the penis for a few seconds when you feel close to ejaculation to reduce urgency. Both take practice — don’t expect magic on the first try.
Pelvic floor exercises (Kegels) can give you more control. Tighten the muscles you use to stop urine, hold for a few seconds, then release. Do sets several times a day for weeks to notice a change. Also try longer foreplay and different positions; less direct stimulation can help prolong things.
Condoms or thicker condoms designed to reduce sensation can buy time. A relaxed pace, slower breathing, and openly talking with your partner about pacing often lowers anxiety and improves performance.
Topical anesthetics (lidocaine or prilocaine creams/sprays) numb the glans a bit and often delay ejaculation. Apply as directed, wait the recommended time, and wipe off excess to avoid numbing your partner. Side effects include reduced pleasure or temporary numbness.
Oral options include certain SSRIs like paroxetine or sertraline that are used off-label and can delay ejaculation. Dapoxetine is a short-acting SSRI approved for PE in some countries; it’s taken on demand. PDE5 inhibitors (Viagra-type drugs) sometimes help, especially if erectile trouble coexists. Any pill can cause side effects or interact with other meds, so check with your doctor first.
See a doctor if PE is persistent, causes real distress, or harms your relationship. A clinician can check for medical causes, discuss safe medication choices, and refer you to a sex therapist if anxiety or relationship issues play a role.
Small practical steps work: try behavioral techniques, practice pelvic floor exercises, use topical agents if needed, and talk openly with your partner. If self-help doesn’t help after a few weeks, reach out to a healthcare professional — there are reliable treatments and a lot less stigma than you might think.
Want more reading? Explore our related guides on treatments and safe online options for men’s sexual health on SpringMeds.
